The past months:
when I last wrote, our community had just experienced devastational tornados.
I had assisted in the relief efforts and my heart had been ripped out by the lives lost, homes lost, lives tossed upside down, and equally as much-the love shown neighbor to neighbor throughout our community.
We all have watched and heard about miracles on every street that was affected.
God's hand has been outstretched...
As I sit here 3 months later (almost to the day)...
wow...3 months its already been???..
there is still much work to be done, and there are still remnants of lives torn apart.
I drove past the home that I assisted during the "relief efforts" (I think that's the term we have used so much)
last week...
the land had been cleared and there was a new mobile home in place where the home that was ripped apart had once stood...
I slowed down and stared...
My heart was racing...
Me and my children looked at what was still devastation...
I wanted to knock on the door...but I drove past.
My heart still beat faster as I looked at what once had been...
and what had now become.
After I had worked in the relief efforts the first week of the storm...a co-worker (Kim Morgan) suggested that I design a tshirt for us to sell for relief effort fundraising...
I did...
and within 30 minutes, the shirt was completed (the design anyway).
Within the first 4 weeks, we had sold enough shirts at $15 per shirt to raise over $10,000.00 to give toward storm relief victims and and workers...
Sidenote: I might add that most all of these sales were from FACEBOOK. Who says facebook is all...well, you know.
PRAISE HIM IN THE STORM was the phrase we used on the shirt...and yes, we STILL-- PRAISE HIM.
School ended...my son's 6th grade year,
I took a very impromtu trip to NEW YORK CITY..the place I love the most...with a friend, my daughter, and 2 of her friends...
much needed...
much fun...
much laughter...
just much.
The night we returned home was the night our lives took another turn.
Some of you will know what I'm talking about...and to the others, well...I never want to bring anyone into an unsolicited conversation...that's rude.
I'll put it this way:
Sometimes, life is going along as you think it should---
the way you have it planned--
in such a way that it's almost like you've made a checklist and you've checked it off ever so neatly---
and then------
it comes to a screaching hault...
no warning...
no signs...
no preface...
just hits you dead in the face.
It's these unexpected times that hit hardest...
things happen...
people leave your life without warning...
people you love.
Your children hurt...
you hurt.
You wake up the next morning and shake your head, thinking it was a dream the day before...
and then you realize...
it wasn't.
You try to be strong,
for your children,
you keep going,
go to work,
routine motions,
routine smiles,
tears out of nowhere,
it just...
hurts.
You try to make sense of it.
You try to blame someone.
You try to ignore it.
You try to get mad.
You try to pray it away.
You cry.
You hurt.
and then,
you finally realize...
HE is still ---and always will be--- in control.
There is a plan.
HIS plan.
“Forget the former things;
do not dwell on the past.
See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
Isaiah 43:18-19
He is truth...He speaks it in His word...Be still and Know that HE IS GOD...
He is perfect...we're not...Far from it, I might add.
It's no one's fault...
It's in the plan.
Acceptance...who created this word...this action...
yuch!
But acceptance is the only thing to do.
Acceptance...Faith...Trust...Know...
that God always takes care of his children.
He will NEVER forsake the ones that serve him...the ones that have given their lives to Him...Never.
I teach this...I know this...
and now, I have to BELIEVE this...and LIVE this.
This was a family affair...we all hurt from it.
But the one it affected the very most, was my precious daughter.
I stopped for her.
I needed to be nothing but a mother for awhile.
It's fine that others may not understand...I knew what I needed to do.
I stopped my classes for the summer...I simply needed to be a mother for my children..and nothing much more. WHat an important job I have...the most important job---honor---privledge in the world... MOTHER.
I take it seriously...God granted me this role...He had faith in ME...only ME for these 2 children.
I will not let HIM down.
I will NOT let THEM down.
So I was simply there for them...
I talked.
I listened.
I held.
I rocked.
I cried with...
I cried in silence...alone.
I tried to make them laugh...
I came home and sat with...
Simple things.
I learned.
I learned more from my children than they learned from me...
the strength, dignity, poise, class and FAITH my daughter exemplified during this time was consuming to all those around her. We stood back and watched in amazement, awe, disbelief and respect.
THose that didn't see it...chose not to.
I looked up to heaven so many times and stood amazed at what MIGHTY GOD taught that precious child...
and what she in turn, taught me.
I did make one promise to her:..................
that I KNEW, GOD would NEVER forsake her,..
that He would pull her not only out of the pit...
but that he would reward her for being a good and faithful servant.
And of course,
of course...,
OF COURSE!!!!!
He did.
Now.....
after this storm...
there are smiles, hugs, laughter, joy, compassion, love...like never before.
once again: we all have learned how to:
“Forget the former things;
do not dwell on the past.
See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
Isaiah 43:18-19
This trial was hard.
There were people that didn't understand.
There were those that turned away.
There were those that stuck close, like glue.
There were remarks, RUMORS (and just that...rumors), ridicule...
We saw true friendships...ahhhh...our friends...I wish there was a better word...oh, I know:
unconditional---unstoppable---compassionate love
We saw people leave our lives.
We saw hurt--first hand.
We saw true love.
We saw GOD in action.
We saw so much...
But this trial is almost a remnant in our souls...a brief encounter...a moment in time.
Life is moving again...
fast.
About to begin a new school year.
My son---a 7th grader.
My daughter---2nd year of college.
Me?...
About to succeed in one of the greatest accomplishments of my life...
I should graduate from college with my BFA in Graphic Design in December!!!!
YES!!!
I not only will graduate, but with a BFA...a step further than a BA...I never dreamed...!!!!
I will humbly, but loudly (is that a contradiction>?????) say:
I will do this while:
working a full time+++ job,
working an additional part time job,
raising 2 children --- alone,
Choice of a Lifetime,
football, baseball, basketball practices and games...
everything in between---and there's a lot of in BETWEEN!!!
and at the age of 46!!!!
yes! I am proud...not boastful...just unbelievably...
Proud.
I can honestly say it has been one of the hardest things I have pursued...
I am almost there...
Priase God.
I look at what in 3 weeks, will be 46 years of life...
and at the beginning of this writing I said I would let you decide on how I am feeling...
but now, after writing and thinking...and feeling
I can tell you the answer...
I am astoundingly, unashamedly, unspeakably...
thankful.
And right now...
I'm just goin to...
smile.
It's quite simple.
These are my thoughts,
Dara
